“Monster, hide!” is a cute little game my husband plays with the kids where they hide under a blanket to hide from an imaginary monster. Imaginary to them, but, real to me.

Having children evolved fear, moved it to a more prominent space in my every day. Fear of small little things that could interfere with their daily happiness, to the heavy-hitters; bullying, sickness, accidents, being kidnapped, and death. It’s very scary to put in writing, but it’s true. There are scary monsters I want to hide them from–everywhere.

When I look at my cute little kids’ faces, with their innocence and ignorance to the monsters that exist in the world, my need to protect them is full throttle and there’s no slowing it down. I want them to only ever fear the monsters in their closet or under their beds. Because those monsters aren’t ever the real threat.

Being a Mommy heightens every one of my senses. Like a mother lion, elephant, bird, no matter what the animal–from big to small–that innate motherly instinct is ferocious–always on alert, ready to take whatever actions to protect my babies.

But along with this overwhelming instinct to protect them is my biggest fear; fear in knowing that I cannot always protect them from all the scary monsters; I sure as shit will stand guard.